229: How to Raise Your Vibration

You’re listening to the Vibrant Happy Women podcast, episode number 229. Do you ever find yourself feeling a little bit low, down in the dumps, having less energy than you might have in the past? Well, in this episode we’re talking about how to raise your energy and vibration, to live a high vibe life. Stay tuned.

Hi, I'm Jen Riday. This podcast is for women who want to feel more vibrant, happy, aligned, and alive. You'll gain the emotional, physical, and spiritual tools you need to get your sparkle back and ensure that depression, anxiety, and struggle don't rule your life. Welcome to the Vibrant Happy Women Podcast.

Hey my vibrant and happy friends, welcome back to the Vibrant Happy Women podcast. I am Dr. Jen Riday. And we’re talking about energy and vibration today.

This is a topic near and dear to my heart because for, I would say the first, almost half of my life, assuming I live as long as I want to, maybe not the first half, the first third of my life I identified as a person who has depression. My mom had depression, my grandma had depression. I don’t know about my great grandma but it seems to be something that came down the chain. And I believed the thought that this is genetic. I’m always going to suffer with this, darn it all.

I remember times once I hit puberty where I would watch family videos and I would just find them so incredibly sad for no reason. That was an indicator that things started to shift. I remember times in college, you know, college is tricky, you’re not getting as much sleep as you want. But I remember going on walks and just feeling so incredibly lonely and sad, and I couldn’t figure out why. But I remember physically feeling that sadness in my heart area, almost like someone was pushing down on my chest with their hand.

I remember moments as a stay at home mom when my marriage was bad and my kids were exhausting, and, well, moments, how about almost all the time, when I felt like life was so heavy and so hard, and nearly impossible. And I was so exhausted and I think I cried every day at least once, yeah, depression. Well, interestingly, Tony Robbins says we don’t have depression as much as we do depression. And that can be a super controversial statement. However, there is some truth there.

In his book, Power Versus Force, David Hawkins describes that our energy goes from low vibration to high vibration. I’ll read this chart in order. The low vibration emotions, starting with the lowest are shame — then it goes up from there — shame, guilt, apathy, grief, fear. Then we start to move up into a little more energy: desire, anger, pride, courage, neutrality, willingness, acceptance, reason, love, joy, peace and enlightenment.

Now, think about the feeling of shame. Shame is often accompanied by thoughts of self-pity, like “I can’t do this. I’m not good enough. I suck. I’m a loser. I’m a bad mom.” Think for a moment what shame feels like in your body. Most people will describe it as heavy, like a rock, either in the heart area or the solar plexus; it can be different for you. We all have our unique bodies and the unique way we feel emotions. But shame is heavy. It almost makes my shoulders sink down and inward as I think about it, as if my body wants to protect me.

Shame is the lowest vibration emotion, it makes us feel worthless, fundamentally flawed. And if you’re feeling a sense of shame regularly, why would you feel happy? Can you see where I’m going with this? A lot of times the way that we do depression is thinking the thoughts that generate feelings of those low vibration emotions like shame, guilt, apathy, grief, fear, and so on.

So when I have been most depressed in my life, what thoughts are running through my head? You know what they are. “I’m not good enough. This is never going to get better. I’m a horrible mom” and on, and on, and on. Luckily I’ve learned that I need to stop those pity parties in their tracks and do it quick and raise my vibration or my energetic state back up that chain. I don’t know about you, but I want to spend the most of my time in love, joy and peace.

And just like depression, just like shame or any of those other low vibe emotions we can think the thoughts that generate the high vibe emotions. As we’ve talked about on this podcast, every emotion is generated by a thought. This is a fact, 10% of those thoughts are happening at the conscious level, we’re aware of them.

If you think about what you’re thinking right now, if you pay attention, you might be thinking, “This is going to be a bad weekend, I’m going to be stressed with the kids, we can’t go anywhere”. Those thoughts generate a feeling of, “Uh”, for you, right? Maybe it’s despondence, a little bit of low mood, sadness, depression, those get lower vibe down on that chart.

Well, how can you shine your flashlight of consciousness onto a different thought? It could be true, everything you thought, but why not focus on something else like it’s going to be a beautiful day, the sky is blue, the sun is shining, the leaves on the trees look gorgeous. Simply by changing the focus of your attention you can start to generate different feelings of acceptance, reason, love, joy, peace, all of those higher vibe emotions which feel amazing.

Now, think about the feeling of peace or joy, let’s go with joy for a moment. Joy, generate joy in your body for a minute. How would you describe that feeling of joy? For me it’s almost shaking excitement. It’s almost like I can feel a vibration of jittery, anticipation, and joy, almost so I can’t contain it in my body, it forces a smile to my lips, joy, oh my gosh! Yes, joy, it feels so different. And can you feel in your body how there seems to be more energy, more emotion, more momentum, more vibration?

Now, to solidify this understanding of energy, think about the states of matter. We have solid, liquid gas. The molecules at a solid state are moving slowly, very slowly, and that makes them turn into a solid. If you add heat, they start to move faster. And let’s talk about ice, it can turn into water, they’re moving faster those molecules. Add a little more heat, they start to move really, really fast and they’re vibrating so fast that they become a gas and they become air.

And the same thing, think of emotions in the same way, the low vibe emotions, sadness, fear, apathy, shame, they’re heavy, they’re solid, they keep you stuck, they don’t feel good. You want things to move in there, you want that energy to move. So by changing your thoughts, focusing on something positive, being grateful, for example, you move up that chain and hopefully as you practice this, you spend more and more time in those high energy, high vibe states of love, joy and peace, which is a good thing because mood is contagious, energy is contagious.

Those beautiful mirror neurons in our brains pick up on this in milliseconds, super fast. And as the energetic heart of the home, we women are giving our families an amazing gift when we can nail down what it means to live in a high vibe state. We talk about this a lot in the Vibrant Happy Women Club, how to continuously change your thoughts so that you will feel the high vibe emotions of love, joy, peace, happiness, positivity, and that helps you show up so much different for your family. So they can have the contagious gift of those higher vibe states.

All of us were raised with a certain energetic emotional baseline. I want you to think of your home of origin, your parents. What was the predominant emotion there? Was it worry, peace, joy, shame, guilt, fear? What was happening there? Well, you spent about 18 years there and your brain learned an energetic baseline that can stick with you for decades unless you become aware of it and learn how to change your thoughts.

So I mentioned that my mom and my grandma both ‘had’ depression. Now, I’ve questioned over the years, perhaps different than having depression they learned how to do depression because they picked up on the energetic baseline from each of their parents respectively. And it’s just been passing down the chain of my ancestors.

Now, a word to the wise here really quick. I am not opposed to antidepressants, those of you who are on them, stay on them. I have been on one for various times in my life, super helpful. I learned maybe a lower vibration baseline and that probably means in my brain my receptors are not picking up all the dopamine they need to feel fully functional.

In fact, studies can show that some people have a receptor problem in picking up that dopamine and might just physiologically need that medication. So no judgment if you have been diagnosed with depression and been prescribed a medication, stick with it, some of them are very, very good. I have loved the one I have taken over time as well.

That said, I think it can be even more effective when you start to tackle your thoughts. What are you thinking right now? What do you think throughout the day? Now, remember, 10%, only 10% of those thoughts are conscious, but becoming aware of them, shining a light on them, changing them to something that generates happiness, love, joy or peace can make a huge difference in how you feel. My favorite tools for this are the brain download and the thought table which we work on continuously in the Vibrant Happy Women Club.

If you have ever wanted to up-level your baseline energy, so you can pass on a greater legacy, a greater mood to your children, definitely join us in the club. You will learn the art of thinking and showing up like a truly happy and high vibe person, that’s what it’s all about.

Throughout the month of August we’re going to be talking about this exact theme in the Vibrant Happy Women Club. We’re talking about health, and mood, and energy. And I’ll be leading some classes on the foods I eat that help to boost my mood. How I’ve handled depression for myself over the years. How to do self-care that infuses you with energy. And we have a chakra healing class. I’m going to teach a class on tips for managing depression and low mood, a class on abundant energy, a class on how to change your state.

So I’m super excited for all of the fun, mood boosting high vibe teachings and classes we’re going to have in the club throughout August. Join us if you want to get good at this, if you want to be energetically higher vibe.

Now, in addition to learning to think higher vibe thoughts, and becoming aware of all of the subconscious thoughts, the thoughts you’re not aware of, that are affecting your mood and energy and we talk about that in the club. You can do the things that raise your vibration all day long. And I wanted to share a few of my favorites.

Getting eight plus hours of sleep, I think that one is huge. On the days I haven’t gotten my full eight plus hours, I have a mood. It’s so simple. And why do we struggle with this? Well, just try to get to bed in the nines, before that clock shifts to ten, get your buns into bed in the nines. That’s kind of my tip for you there.

Exercise and yoga, of course, exercise changes the whole physiological compounds flowing in your blood, it increases testosterone, endorphins. It just totally pumps you up.

And independent of exercise, I’ve found that yoga, the act of stretching and doing some of my favorite poses, including pigeon pose, releases some pent up negative energy. I’m telling you, every time I do a pigeon pose I feel a flood of maybe sadness that I’m holding onto, that I just want to release. Sometimes I have cried in pigeon pose, but I find that if I do it often enough, most days I just feel that flood of negative emotions releasing. I don’t actually have to cry, but I got rid of it.

Isn’t that crazy to think that your body stores emotion in the muscles? But I experience it again and again with certain yoga poses.

Okay, this is a hot tip, dry brushing. Dry brushing, I first heard of this from a friend who is a health coach and I thought that’s crazy. I kept hearing about it, you know how the universe inspires to help you see something you need? So I ordered a dry brush set on Amazon, one has a long handle so I can reach my back, one has a shorter handle. And they have just the most fantastic soft, but perfectly powered bristles that will just stimulate the lymph in your body. You brush all over your skin and it’s not so much the goal of exfoliating or anything, but it’s moving the lymph.

The lymph in your body really only moves through exercise or dry brushing or massage, it’s not part of your circulatory system. But I find such a euphoric feeling happens when I dry brush, it’s small but so good. So get a dry brush and try it.

Another favorite is qigong, spelled q-i-g-o-n-g. You literally slap your skin to move the lymph. And if you have ever spent time in China, I have not, but I have heard that you’ll often see all those cute little Chinese grandmas at the bus stop or wherever they are, slapping themselves. Well, they’re doing qigong. And so qigong, look it up, find a video, it’s not painful but it can be very euphoric, just like the dry brushing. If I had to pick one I wouldn’t, because they each seem to give me a unique benefit, qigong and dry brushing, great little mood boosters.

Okay, of course, vitamin D3, I always take vitamin D3, I’ve told all my friends in Wisconsin about it because we don’t have as much sun as you all, here. All my Canadian friends or further north than me, I’m sending my love, vitamin D3, friends, we need it. Time outside, just getting that bright light in your eyes, and supplement that time outside with a light box. I have one shining in my eyes right now, even though it’s summer I just find that bright light really boosts my focus for the day and helps me to feel good.

Okay, greens, make a green smoothie. Reese Witherspoon, you all know who she is. I saw her do a live where she said she has drank a green smoothie every day for 10 years. She blended up two heads of romaine, she added pear and apple and banana and coconut water and spinach. Essentially she said she just dumps whatever’s in her fridge. But the point is every day for the past decade she has drank a green smoothie. Well, I don’t know about you, but I want her skin and I want to feel amazing.

So, green smoothies or green juice, just boost up your system and give it some of those greens that we need. Additionally, get enough protein.

Another favorite, meditation. You know I was talking about how our thoughts generate feelings, right? Well, meditation is a chance to (a) either clear away your thoughts and just tuck in and think nothing, that’s the ideal. Or (b) which is my version, meditation is a chance to become aware of my thoughts and feelings. The act of sitting still long enough to see what’s going on in my body. “What’s this? I’m feeling, ugh, that means I must be thinking a thought.”

What thought am I thinking that’s making me feel ugh? I’m thinking my to do list is too long, that’s one of my go to negative thoughts. I stop the thought, I replace it with, yeah, I get to work on my priorities today and let go of the rest. And I start to feel better and then you ladder up the thought again, and again, and again until you get to a high vibe thought like “My life is amazing, I’m so productive!” and you go from there, so meditation. Different versions work, trust me.

Of course brain downloads and thought tables, we do those in the club, come and join us if you want to get good at those because they are powerful.

Gratitude, focusing on three things you’re grateful for. I have shared this before, but studies show just being grateful is as effective for your mood as an antidepressant, as effective. It goes back to the thought that we don’t so much have depression as we do depression. We learned patterns of thinking which we can unlearn. Maybe we need an antidepressant as we’re learning to unlearn those negative thoughts. Maybe we need an antidepressant because hey, Covid.

But the more we can ladder up our thoughts and make our automatic thoughts more and more positive, the happier we’re going to feel, to the point where you just can’t believe how much joy there is. This happens to me a lot where I think, wow, my life is amazing. I am so happy.

And I’m thinking these thoughts but you guys, my life isn’t really any more amazing than anyone else’s. We have massive amounts of mental health issues here. We have Covid happening, but yet I keep practicing my thoughts, and my joy increases, and this is real stuff. So, definitely brain downloads and thought tables and gratitude.

Okay, scripture, prayer, are very effective. I love the calm feeling of reading wise words from beloved authors, for some of you, Bible, other scriptures, the Quran. Reading scriptures just can be very soothing.

Okay, here’s another one, Wim Hof. Wim Hof kept me alive when I had Covid, thank you, Wim Hof. Wim Hof teaches a breathing method where you breathe a lot, 30 times really deep and then you hold your breath a certain way. Now, you might think you can do this on your own. But for some reason I have to follow Wim to be able to hold my breath a full minute like he asks you to.

So look up the Wim Hof breathing method, he has a video on YouTube, it’s about 11 minutes and one second, that’s the one, and follow along. Now, he will get you to hold your breath for 90 seconds, I can’t do that. The longest I’ve gone is one minute and 10 seconds. I like to blame my weird lung capacity but I’m not going to go there.

Okay, Wim Hof also teaches taking a cold shower or getting in a cold ice bath. I have not done that but the cold shower is a huge mood booster. Why? It pumps up your adrenalin and your cortisol just for a moment and it kind of stops any patterns of negative thinking, and the negative chemistry that goes along with the negative thinking.

So take 30 to 60 seconds every time you’re in the shower to turn it all the way to cold. I stand there and I grip the sides of the shower and I just count to 60 while the cold water freezes. And I’ll tell you, in about 30 seconds you can’t feel it anymore and you become numb. But I’m telling you, it’s a huge mood booster, it’s a huge vibration raiser. So I’m counting, I’m counting, it’s freezing cold, I get to the one minute mark and I ram that shower handle back to the warm and I’m like, thank, thank you, thank you. Anyway, cold showers.

Finally, last but not least for today, I want to remind you to hydrate. Your body needs water to function, to digest, to circulate the blood, to do all the things. Of course you mood is going to be benefitted by having proper hydration.

These are just a few of the tips we’re going to be talking about all month long on how to raise your energy, to boost your mood, to raise your vibration. And I want to share that, vibrant happy women, that word vibrant comes from vibration. Vibrant people have high vibrational states, predominantly. No matter how you were raised, what example you were given, whatever your vibrational baseline might be, we want to raise it. That’s what this podcast is about, that’s what the Vibrant Happy Women Club is about, becoming a higher vibe woman.

It feels amazing to spend more and more time in those states of love, joy and peace. And sometimes you just need a group of women supporting you doing the same thing because we tend to be like the people we interact with most. If the people around you are not raising your vibrational state, it’s going to be harder for you.

But if you’re continuously doing the work and brushing elbows, and filling out your club workbook and doing all the things that will help you stay higher vibe, it becomes your norm. You become happier and more joyous and you give that gift to your family through their interactions with you. You get to help your children have a higher vibrational baseline than you might have grown up with, breaking the patterns, making things better. So definitely join us in the club if you want to do that work with us.

Alright, my friends, now, one more thing, I am hosting the Vibrant Happy Women online retreat again in August. And the topic is boundaries. Boundaries, oh my gosh. So you’ve been home with Covid with your kids, with your spouse, maybe more than you’ve ever spent time with them before, lots of positives.

But what I’ve heard you talking about my mom friends is boundaries. How can I have boundaries? Well, in this special Vibrant Happy Women retreat, a onetime event, you will learn exactly what a boundary is and is not, how to identify toxic behavior and emotional abuse and what to do about it. You will discover the six types of boundaries you can set to stop the energy and time leaks that leave you feeling drained and unproductive. You will understand how the shoulds might be causing you to sabotage your own boundaries.

I’m going to teach you a proven and powerful phrase that will help you nail it when it comes to setting boundaries and much, much more. Definitely join us, the link is at jenriday.com/onlineretreat, jenriday.com/onlineretreat. You can bring a friend as well for just 20 bucks. You sign up for yourself, you can bring a friend at a discounted rate, they will get their own link. You’ll get your own link. And we’re going to learn together on a Saturday.

This is going to be juicy stuff. You will come away with complete clarity about the boundaries you need to set in your marriage, with your kids, with your career, with your time, with your health, how to honor the boundaries to yourself. Did you know that boundaries help you keep your commitments to yourself and to show up with integrity for yourself? Integrity is honoring and being honest with yourself and others, commitment is keeping your promises to yourself and others.

Well, a lot of us struggle to be committed to ourselves, to honor our promises to ourselves, to take care of ourselves, to exercise, to make that time to do the things that raise our vibration, coming back to that language. Boundaries will help you nail it. And we’re going to teach you how to do it in a loving way. So get your spot, spots are definitely limited, this is a Zoom class where I will interact with you, I will see you, you’ll be able to ask questions.

We’re going to do workshopping, you’ll want to come with a journal and a water bottle and get ready to dive deep. Get a place where you can be alone, sit in your walk-in closet, sit in the bathroom, lock a door. Find a place where no one’s going to bother you and we’re going to go deep into our minds and hearts and learn from our own inner wisdom what boundaries we need to set to feel better, to raise our vibration, to be the women we want to be. To show up as the moms we want to be, the wives we want to be, the employees, the entrepreneurs.

You know deep within your heart that your higher self wants you to come and do a little bit more. That you’ve been kind of feeling ugh. If that’s true for you then this boundaries class is going to change the game, I promise. So sign up, get your spot, jenriday.com/onlineretreat, bring a friend.

Alright my friends, this has been fun. I am so grateful to talk to you about energy and vibration, and I hope to see lots of you in the club and at the online retreat. Well, my friends, make it a vibrant and happy weekend. Take care.

If you enjoy this podcast, you have to check out the Vibrant Happy Women Club. It’s my monthly group coaching program where we take all this material to the next level and to get you the results that will blow your mind. Join me in the Vibrant Happy Women Club at jenriday.com/join.