105: Using Vulnerability to Let Go of Perfectionism and Become More Confident with Gina Brodtmann

March 18, 2018

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Do you ever feel like everyone is watching and judging, and that you “should” parent a certain way or you’re doing it wrong? Or that when things get scary or stressful you need to control the situation as perfectly as possible? Gina Brodtmann faced the same struggles as her son went through drug treatment, but she came out on the other side with more confidence and happiness. Learn how she did it in this episode.

What You'll Learn in this Episode:

Gina explains what she learned through her struggles, including:

The importance of allowing yourself to be vulnerable (and the authentic, deep friendships and connections that will come as a result).
Why the most awesome things in life are on the other side of fear.
How to let go of perfectionism and stop comparing yourself and your family to other people.
The secret to dropping anger and resentment for those hard people in your life.
And so much more…

Nuggets of Wisdom from Gina:

“There is dignity in struggle. It gives the soul muscles.” ~Magda Gerber

“We can’t look at our children as extensions of what we want them to be or what society is trying to make everybody be. We are all these unique beings that are just full of our own unique potential and possibility. You can’t find this one cookie cutter answer of how you’re supposed to be a good parent and how you’re supposed to be a good wife or whatever. You have to look at that child that you are dealing with. You have to look at that child and say, ‘How can I be the best parent to you?' Or, ‘How can I be the best wife to my husband?' What’s the point of comparing ourselves to everybody else when everyone has a different set of circumstances than we have? We are all in our unique situations. Doing what’s best for me or my family despite what everyone else thinks is one of my big life journeys.”

“I don’t know what my future holds. I know I’m happier than I’ve ever been. I’m just starting to really play with this. Feeling this fear and doing it anyway and just going forward. I’m just going step by step. So, yeah, maybe I would write a book. I would teach a class or something. I’m so passionate about this child development. Passionate about minimalism. Passionate about what you (Jen Riday) do with Vibrant Happy Women. I feel it’s all connected. How could I write something to show how all of these are connected? Keep it simple and see the best and it’s all the little steps that add up to a happy life.”

What does it mean to be a Vibrant Happy Woman?

“Slowing way down. When I try so hard to chase after people-pleasing or perfectionism, I get so frazzled. When I slow way down and see the people right in front of me, I know what to do and do it. It helps me become a better mom and better wife. I try to live in the moment, stop rushing, and be in the present moment – simplifying.”

A Challenge from Gina:

“Think about a person you struggle with – what if you were told with absolute certainty that they are actually doing the best they can? How would that change the way you see them? That opened my mind in a new way. I would drop my anger and either help them or set a boundary. I found a lot of freedom with that. How does it change you? How does it change how you feel inside? What if you just accept it and think that what if they are doing the best they can? How can I motivate them? How can I push them? They are doing the best they can. Maybe the best they’re doing is not good enough for you. Maybe you’re going to have to say, ‘Then this is not going to work' or something. But you might instead, say, ‘OK, yeah, I am going to stop putting them in a situation where they keep failing. I’m going to help them. I’m going to accept that. I'm going to need to take more responsibility or let go of some expectations or something. There is a lot of freedom in that.”

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About jen

Jen Riday is a mom of 6 and life coach who loves to help women experience massive happiness as they let go of stress, sadness or other chronic emotions of negativity.